I do dumb things occationally

4. Beer Slushies and Strip Monopoly

When you are in college there are certain things expected of you. You are supposed to sleep in till noon every chance you get, you eat Chipotle a minimum of 4 times a week and anything can become a drinking game as long as you apply enough imagination. Exhibit A: The roommates and I were bored one Friday night. So we decided we would play a board game and have a beer. It started out innocent enough. We got out a game of Monopoly, which is of course a game of skill, and started to play. Monopoly began to get kind of boring, people began to wander off. We didn’t wander far, just to the kitchen where one roommate decided to explore the unknown territory of beer slushy making. There is an excellent reason that beer slushy territory is unknown. None of us actually thought that a beer slushy would be good, but we had just bought a blender and it needed to be tested. We had nothing to make margaritas; we only had beer… well beer and ice. A coke slushy is good, beer is good, why not a beer slushy? He made it, and poured it into a big glass. He got a straw and he sat back down at the table where we were playing. We watched him when he took the first sip. It was pretty obvious that beer slushies were not going to be marketable. In fact none of us would even try a sip. Instead we suddenly were very concerned about the game. We decided to put all of our energy into changing the rules of monopoly so that we could indulge in our drinking, and continue to ignore the offers of beer slushy. This was the birth of Strip Monopoly. If you have ever played Monopoly you know it is a very long game, it can take hours. It becomes an even longer game when you have to take shots for landing on go to jail, and when you are allowed to sell your clothes for money in order to pay your rent. The slushy creator was very good at monopoly, probably because he had been nursing one very nasty, chunky beer for the last few hours and the rest of us were nicely toasted off the perks of going to jail. Next to him was a roommate who was very bad at Monopoly. Not because he was unintelligent but rather because his luck had been terrible this game and he practically had his own room at the jail house. Do to the rules of the game he was rapidly progressing from bad to worse. Suddenly we hear a knock at the door, who could it be? Oh it was our little jail bird’s girlfriend. “Hi nice to meet you, yes, my name is Sara. Why am I in my underwear? Well I just landed on Boardwalk and the rent was outrageous.” I explained at if this was the most logical thing in the world. “It was beyond my means so I was forced to sell my shirt and pajama pants.” She comes further into the dining room. I cannot imagine what she must have thought. At the kitchen table there were two roommates without their shirts on, one wincing as he drinks some yellow concoction of unknown origins, there is a chick she had never met standing next to her in nothing but her skimpies and finally her eyes come to rest on the love of her life. He is in nothing but his grey boxer briefs and is sitting with his head resting on the table, slowly rocking. “Don’t worry; we paid him to keep his underwear on!” The girl next to her says smiling as if this made everything all better. This situation was perfectly normal, really. The girlfriend nodded and then silently helped her boyfriend leave the table and go up to bed. Sometimes you just can’t improve a first impression.